For the past two years, I have been literally battling for my life due to a lie that I have believed since my husband left me two years ago for a woman that we had met on a vacation we were on. The devastation from this affair and the ensuing rejection left me... more often than not, begging God to take my life. I knew that I would never take my own life, but I so very badly wanted God to take it for me. The week of the conference I said to myself that I did feel like I was slowly dying.
I realized through the teachings I heard, that first of all, my very dear, and sweet husband, bought every lie the enemy was selling him. When the enemy whispered to him, "You're not happy, marriage isn't for you, you're too selfish to be married, this other woman is more of what you are looking for, etc." , he believed this with his whole being. Then the enemy turned his attention to me and I said sit right down and tell me how you want me to feel. Oh, he said things like, you are impossible to live with, that's why this husband and your first left you for other women, you couldn't keep a man if your life depended on it, you should have worked more hours, been a better homemaker, gotten a life for yourself instead of waiting around for your husband to come home, you know his family's business was always way more important to him than you were, and on and on.
After coming into this awareness of my enemy and learning how he operates, my eyes were so open to his tactics. He was especially concerned with my husband and our marriage, I see now because prior to our marriage, my cradle Catholic husband had no relationship with God and the sacraments. After we married I had a major conversion and he seemed to have a small one; but big enough that he actually desired to attend daily mass for two and a half years and receive the sacraments on a regular basis. I am sure that the enemy hated that we had these conversions and that our marriage was becoming a sign to other couples. Oh, if we had known our enemy back then.
But Praise God! I see! I see! And what now has been revealed to me is that none of my husband's decisions were about me. He bought the lie and in turn, I bought the lie. The oppressing spirit of rejection that has oppressed me for the past two years was commanded to leave and I truly feel that it is gone. I now know who I am, the precious, precious daughter of Almighty God. He created me and everything he created is GOOD and I am VERY GOOD and I am WORTHY OF LOVE, I am WORTHY OF FIDELITY, I am WORTH SACRIFICING FOR. I know this because I know my savior and HE has done a great work in me.
Thank you again for bringing this ministry to the world. I am looking forward to sharing all that I have learned with others so that they also may experience the freedom that I feel.